I am just having the hardest time! I feel such anxiety and frustration. I really need to talk it out, Ian keeps telling me that I'm making something out of nothing. That I just need to man up and act like nothing happened. But I don't feel like that, and thus - I'm struggling.
I *want* to go to McD tomorrow. However, not only do I think I'm not really welcome with all my kids... but I think its rude to go because of Veronica. Which pisses me off to NO END. Because I'm the hippie one - she's NOT and I'm the one that introduced her. If anyone stays home, UGH. But do I expect her to stay home on my account? No, of course not.
I need some girl time... but I also don't really want to bring April. I'm so freaking lame. I can't just leave April home with all the babies, that would be beyond lame. Don't ya think? Lame, lame, lame, lame!
And I would most likely have to pay for everyone's lunch. I am not sure I can afford to do that. Maybe if I brought my own apples and milk or something... then it would be french fries and a $1 hamburger or something.
I don't know. It would be uncomfortable and I'm not sure I would have a good time anyway. I mean its 4 babies plus 5 kids to McD. I don't know how I expect to have any conversation anyway.